The 5 advantages of a pregnancy in your 40s and the wonderful reasons you have a head up on the other younger mamas on the block.
Have you started to notice now that you are pregnant, you tend to see pregnant women everywhere? When you start looking around at other pregnant mommas, it might become easy to second guess your sanity for having a baby after 40 years old. Let me share 5 advantages of a pregnancy in your 40s and why it can be better than those 20 and 30 somethings out there having babies too.
There are many beautiful advantages to being in your 40s and on the pregnancy journey. Here are just five.
1- You have experienced life.
A successful one at that! You likely have built a career for over decade, so you know how to navigate people skills. Maybe you are a business owner and have experienced disappointment and gain. You have surely enjoyed many successes in your career and accomplishments.
Perhaps you have traveled the world, and have mingled happily with those from a culture different from your own. You have seen and experienced many things and empathized with others. You’ve made thousands of decisions over the years.
So whether this is your first child or your 6th, you are not going to get spooked by every little worry and preoccupation. You KNOW you got this!
If women through the millennia have successfully borne babies, you know you can too. So you can decide to go through your pregnancy with confidence, assurance, and ease.
2- You have your style down.
You know what you like, and what you don’t. Thankfully when it comes to everything from maternity clothing to choices in baby gear, there is something for every unique style of momma. Seek those things and by all means, do not conform to a certain “standard.”
For instance, do not pick a baby blue, bear covered diaper bag if you are a leather and chains toting gal. You can seek and find everything you need, that suits your style, and maintains your identity.
Own your style, just because you are having a baby, doesn’t mean you need to change who you are.
3- You are smarter than that.
You do not have to collapse to the barrage of commercialism that will come at you from all angles. Decide now to put your Wonder Woman shields up, because temptations to stock up on all the latest gadgets to ensure comfort and ease in pregnancy, and in baby rearing, will come blasting down all around you the minute you realize you are pregnant.
I remember the first time I walked into Babies ‘r Us, so reluctantly. I knew I would need some essentials as it had been over 10 years since my last baby was born and I had long since given all that stuff away.
Remember, it had been 10 years since I had a baby, over 7 years since I needed any of that bulky gear and 2 years or more since legos and dolls crept outside the boundaries of my daughter’s room.
So I vowed to not let the barrage of baby STUFF consume us again. I stepped into that store with its baby gear, gadgets, clothes, and toys piled from floor to ceiling. And literally envisioned my Wonder Woman Bracelets of Submission going “ching, ching” as it deflected the urge I would have had 15 years ago to have all that stuff to help me cope with a new baby.
I am here to tell you, you do NOT need it all. You will barely need a thing, and you will thank me as we take this journey together that I held you back from going all in and getting swept up with the tide.
4– You will be well taken care of.
One of the best advantages of being a pregnant woman in your 40s is the tremendous care you will receive for being what is called “high-risk.” If you are as fortunate as I was to have access to a very competent, modern and up to date hospital system, you will have the benefit of having excellent prenatal care.
What I mean by this is the extra tests, ultrasounds and regular checkups you will be entitled to means you and your baby will be checked in on a regular basis. Further easing any fears during your pregnancy, and allowing you loads of opportunities to have your questions answered.
Being able to listen to my baby’s heartbeat, have ultrasounds to be able to see my angel’s round head once a month, and get the assurance from my OB that all was going well, kept me a happy and content mama. And helped protect me from the anxiety some women experience during pregnancy.
There is a time commitment to this, I know. Yet, the reassurances it provides in the still of the night as you think about the future will make the hassle of planning time for extra doctor appointments all worthwhile.
5- You know how to take other people’s opinions with a grain of salt.
There is no other being walking the earth that is peppered with more unrequested opinions than a pregnant woman. Well, perhaps closely followed by a mom with a newborn!
EVERYONE will have an unsolicited piece of advice to share with you. Whether it’s what gender they predict your baby will be to whether it is advisable to for you to bend down to pick up that dropped paper on the floor at only 16 weeks! HA!
The best protection from these nonsense recommendations from well-meaning worrywarts is to be sure your OB has a chill personality. If you get any sense that he or she is uptight, please do yourself a favor and move on.
One of the best gifts I received early on in my pregnancy was the VAST assurance from my new OB that, despite the fact that I was over 40, and had a previous complicated pregnancy in my late 20s, I would be perfectly fine. That I could successfully carry and deliver a healthy baby, and that this 40+ pregnancy thing was becoming ever so common. And it is.
I remember sharing with him that a family member recommended that I not bend down too much. That it was bad for me and the baby. Even early in the pregnancy.
He took one look at me, laughed and assured me that I could do everything I was accustomed to until well along in the pregnancy.
Now, by the time I was 7.5 months, I often decided that fallen objects were not worth the trouble. But that was due more to the girth of my very round belly than to any health concerns. Pregnancy is fun!
My point is, take advice from others with a grain of salt. Just smile, nod and go on your way!
Having a Baby at 40? Remember, You got this!
I have every confidence in you, my seasoned sister. You got this, and you are going to be a great mom. A mom who knows her stuff. A mom that doesn’t overreact. A mom who knows success, and accomplishment and can pass that on to her children. The other bonus is, your man likely has all that going for him as well. Your baby is one lucky kid!
Chandra is the chocolate-chip loving mother of 2 teenage girls who started over again with a baby boy in her 40’s! She is the author of The Mom’s Playbook to Conquering Softball Season. She gives other moms the tools they need to prepare their daughters for real life. Her content is centered on helping girls grow up to be well-rounded, equipped, expressive, confident, intelligent, capable, kind and independent.